Babies

Today another one of my friends told me she’s pregnant. That makes her my third friend who is gong to have a baby before the summer is over. We are all born in July and August 1972 and now three of us are going to have a baby in April, June and August. A bit strange I might say, but very exciting of course. My friend joked around saying that I need to get pregnant soon so we will all have children born in the same year. I didn’t think much about it until I got to the gym and hit the treadmill. This really makes me the only one left without babies. Of course I’ve thought about it from time to time, but I’ve always been able to come up with some older friends that don’t have babies, but not anymore. I don’t know if I should feel sad or just establish the fact that yes, I don’t have any children, so what? The real question is do I really want children? Since I just realised that some men might actually find me interesting and attractive enough to get to know me and spend time with me I have never really pictured myself with children. That’s something for other people. Not me.

The sensible part in me knows that the biological clock ticking. I used to say that if I didn’t have any children by 35 I wouldn’t have any. Now I actually say if I don’t have any children by 40… But the question still remains; do I want to have children? The more I think about it the more confused I get. I just don’t know.